Note: this sections has mainly to do with narcissistic abuse and research, trends and tactics of people with the traits of Narcissistic Personality Disorder or people who have a propensity to control others through abuse.
* The Gist of What I Have to Say to Survivors of Abuse
WARNINGS
* Warning: The You're Useless Phrase", the "You're Nobody Phrase" and the "You're Worthless" Phrase in Narcissistic Abuse and Domestic Violence (discusses how an abuser's upbringing and family prejudices can lead to domestic violence)
* The DARVO tactic of abusers (an important tactic to know about)
- in the comments section you will also notice someone dealing with a domestic violence situation and how this tactic was used on the poster.
* Why Narcissistic Abusers Pick the Worst Times of Your Life to Inflict Pain and Do Damage (very common - they put trying to get more power, domination and control for themselves first when you are in a broken or vulnerable state, instead of helping you)
others are listed in the right column of the blog, particularly under "punishments"
POSTS ON DIFFERENT FORMS OF NARCISSISM
MORE ABUSIVE PERSONALITY DISORDER TRAITS
(SOME ARE TACTICS)
(SOME ARE TACTICS)
* Narcissistic Abuse with Parentification and Infantilization
* Why Do Narcissists Care So Much About Their Image? Narcissism and the Inauthentic False Self: Acting, Faking, Self Aggrandizing, Playing the Victim
* Why Do Narcissists Reject (Discard) Their Most Successful Child?
* Triangulation, Karpman's Triangle, Scapegoat Triangle and Abuse Triangles
* Competition Baiting (competition baiting with abusive co-workers or siblings)
* Cyberbullying
SERIES ON LACK OF EMPATHY IN ABUSERS
SERIES ON HOW PREJUDICE INFLUENCES NARCISSISTIC ABUSE
* Is Racism Linked to Narcissism?
* why abusers, and in particular, narcissists, demand you play a role ... why abusive relationships are more about role-playing than a real relationship, plus looking at prejudiced perspectives
to come: Misogyny and Abuse
SERIES ON SHAMING, BEING SHAMED, AND NARCISSISTS
* Shaming from Abusers, Narcissists
* How Shame is the Core Struggle of Most Narcissists. How it Gets Dumped Onto You, and How They Try to Harvest Regrets and Shame From You. Does It Work For Them?
* Why Shaming Your Children is Not Effective, How Narcissists Respond to Feelings of Shame, What You Can Do if You Are an Adult Child and Your Narcissistic Parents are Still Playing the Shame Game, and How to Start Healing from a Lifetime of Parental Shaming
* The Difference Between Narcissists and Those With Antisocial Personality Disorder: Narcissists Feel Shame and Regret for Hurting Others Even When it Doesn't Have to Do with Empathy, and Antisocial Personality Disordered Do Not
* How Shame is the Core Struggle of Most Narcissists. How it Gets Dumped Onto You, and How They Try to Harvest Regrets and Shame From You. Does It Work For Them?
* Why Shaming Your Children is Not Effective, How Narcissists Respond to Feelings of Shame, What You Can Do if You Are an Adult Child and Your Narcissistic Parents are Still Playing the Shame Game, and How to Start Healing from a Lifetime of Parental Shaming
* The Difference Between Narcissists and Those With Antisocial Personality Disorder: Narcissists Feel Shame and Regret for Hurting Others Even When it Doesn't Have to Do with Empathy, and Antisocial Personality Disordered Do Not
another pertinent post to this discussion:
* Why Do Narcissists Care So Much About Their Image? Narcissism and the Inauthentic False Self: Acting, Faking, Self Aggrandizing, Playing the Victim
TYPES OF SHAMING:
* Should you Forgive Abusive People (with a Discussion on Narcissistic Abuse, Forgiveness Shaming, and a personal journey) - part of the discussion is about how people shame victims of abuse for not forgiving their abusers
new: * Toxic Positivity - shaming you because you talk about your trauma or traumas, or being abused, or your struggles as a survivor of abuse, because it's not "positive". This post is titled: "Toxic Positivity is a Form of Gaslighting When Narcissists, Malignant Narcissists and Sociopaths Tell You to Adopt It, Plus How it Tends to Be Part of Narcissistic Family Systems and How Enablers Use It."
to come:
Gratitude Shaming - shaming you for not being grateful even though you were or are abused
The Shame Rage Spiral - how shame and rage are inexorably linked in narcissistic abuse
How Being Exposed to Shaming Can Create Narcissism in a Child - how being exposed to narcissists and their shame-rage spiral can create narcissism in children.
* Why Do Narcissists Care So Much About Their Image? Narcissism and the Inauthentic False Self: Acting, Faking, Self Aggrandizing, Playing the Victim
TYPES OF SHAMING:
* Should you Forgive Abusive People (with a Discussion on Narcissistic Abuse, Forgiveness Shaming, and a personal journey) - part of the discussion is about how people shame victims of abuse for not forgiving their abusers
new: * Toxic Positivity - shaming you because you talk about your trauma or traumas, or being abused, or your struggles as a survivor of abuse, because it's not "positive". This post is titled: "Toxic Positivity is a Form of Gaslighting When Narcissists, Malignant Narcissists and Sociopaths Tell You to Adopt It, Plus How it Tends to Be Part of Narcissistic Family Systems and How Enablers Use It."
to come:
Gratitude Shaming - shaming you for not being grateful even though you were or are abused
The Shame Rage Spiral - how shame and rage are inexorably linked in narcissistic abuse
How Being Exposed to Shaming Can Create Narcissism in a Child - how being exposed to narcissists and their shame-rage spiral can create narcissism in children.
HOW ABUSIVE FAMILIES TREAT THEIR SCAPEGOATED CHILDREN
* Posts on Scapegoating and Scapegoated Children
Note: I decided to give scapegoating in abusive families its own page as it is something I will be writing a lot more about after switching gears away from the Cluster B Personality Disorders. There are already a number of posts up on that page. Scapegoats have a lot in common with each other.
Note: I decided to give scapegoating in abusive families its own page as it is something I will be writing a lot more about after switching gears away from the Cluster B Personality Disorders. There are already a number of posts up on that page. Scapegoats have a lot in common with each other.
POSTS ON HOW NARCISSISTS TRAUMATIZE AND HURT YOU
IN CLOSE PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS AND AT WORK
IN CLOSE PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS AND AT WORK
Note: most relationships with narcissists will be traumatic and hurtful.
Why Do Narcissists Take the Vindictive Path When People Aren't Doing What They Want? Do Narcissists Get Satisfaction For Revenge, Vindictiveness, and Retaliations?
Why Do Narcissists Take the Vindictive Path When People Aren't Doing What They Want? Do Narcissists Get Satisfaction For Revenge, Vindictiveness, and Retaliations?
POSTS ON SILENCING AND THE SILENT TREATMENT
* Silencing From Narcissistic Parents: "I wasn't allowed to talk about my feelings, thoughts, and experiences, and if I tired to, I was told to shut up or get over it."
* The Silent Treatment
* The Silent Treatment is Abuse!
* The Silent Treatment and Complex PTSD (Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)
* Healing from the Silent Treatment
* The Silent Treatment
* The Silent Treatment is Abuse!
* The Silent Treatment and Complex PTSD (Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)
* Healing from the Silent Treatment
POSTS ON "CAN'T NARCISSISTS CHANGE AND GET BETTER?"
POSTS ON APOLOGIZING AND FORGIVING ABUSE
(should you do it?)
(should you do it?)
* Should you Forgive Abusive People (with a Discussion on Narcissistic Abuse, Forgiveness Shaming, and a personal journey)
* Forgiving abusers: the "You're better than that" family culture that expects victims of familial abuse to make up with their abuser
* Why You Should Not Force Children to Apologize (also discusses forced apologies in abusive narcissistic families)
* Why you should always apologize to your child when you hurt him or her (avoiding trauma in your child)
* Forgiving abusers: the "You're better than that" family culture that expects victims of familial abuse to make up with their abuser
* Why You Should Not Force Children to Apologize (also discusses forced apologies in abusive narcissistic families)
* Why you should always apologize to your child when you hurt him or her (avoiding trauma in your child)
POSTS ON TRAUMA BONDING
* PART I: Some of How Trauma Bonds Are Formed with Narcissists
to come:
Types of Trauma Bonding
How Trauma Bonding Effects Your Physiology
to come:
Types of Trauma Bonding
How Trauma Bonding Effects Your Physiology
POSTS ON WHY YOU HAVE NO CHOICE OR CONTROL OVER WHETHER
SOMEONE WANTS TO ABUSE YOU AND HURT YOU
(even if they say they are hurting you on purpose for a reason:
it has to do with their "personality" and "desires" to hurt others, not you)
SOMEONE WANTS TO ABUSE YOU AND HURT YOU
(even if they say they are hurting you on purpose for a reason:
it has to do with their "personality" and "desires" to hurt others, not you)
* If you are good and show altruism and magnanimity, will that keep you from being abused?
SOME OF THE FALL-OUT FROM BEING BULLIED AND ABUSED
* why narcissistic abuse can hurt so much
HEALING FROM ABUSE, PTSD FROM ABUSE
AND A DISCUSSION ON VARIOUS METHODS TO HEAL, AND TO USE WITH ABUSERS
AND A DISCUSSION ON VARIOUS METHODS TO HEAL, AND TO USE WITH ABUSERS
This will have its own section, but in the meantime, I parked this article here:
* A Major Publication, The New York Times, Talks About "The Gray Rock Method"
* A Major Publication, The New York Times, Talks About "The Gray Rock Method"
COMMON THINGS ABUSERS SAY TO YOU
* The Most Common Things Abusive Parents Say to Their Children and Why It Matters - Survivors of Child Abuse Weigh In
* The "Ungrateful Phrase" (Why Abusers Who Punish Use the Ungrateful Phrase)
* The "You Brought This Upon Yourself" Phrase ("You brought this upon yourself!", why abusers use this phrase)
* The "It's All Your Fault" Phrase (why abusers and narcissists say it is all your fault every time something goes wrong)
CASES OF ABUSE AND ALLEGED ABUSE IN THE MEDIA SPOTLIGHT
(abuse and alleged abuses brought up in public media that I decided to look into and write about)
(abuse and alleged abuses brought up in public media that I decided to look into and write about)
* JonBenet Ramsey and Burke Ramsey: would parents cover up one of their children's murder for the other?
* Why it is Important to Keep the Conversation about Gabby Petito Going, Lessons About Domestic Violence
* Documentary Review: Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich (with a discussion about narcissism and how narcissism effected the victims)
* 9 year old Kendrick Lee found decomposed in apartment in Houston where siblings lived: the Brian Coulter - Gloria Williams case
* Why it is Important to Keep the Conversation about Gabby Petito Going, Lessons About Domestic Violence
* Documentary Review: Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich (with a discussion about narcissism and how narcissism effected the victims)
* 9 year old Kendrick Lee found decomposed in apartment in Houston where siblings lived: the Brian Coulter - Gloria Williams case
UPDATES BY MONTH AND YEAR
* An Update: Writing More Posts With Another Writer - August 9, 2024
* An Update: A Post I am Working On With Someone Else: Do Scapegoats Abandon Other Scapegoats, or Do They Mostly Stick Together? - April 25, 2024
* Some Personal Gratitude to All Who Have Enlightened Me, and a Little on Why I Decided to Research Topics on Narcissism - April 6, 2024
* UPDATE - August 16, 2023
* Some Personal Gratitude to All Who Have Enlightened Me, and a Little on Why I Decided to Research Topics on Narcissism - April 6, 2024
* UPDATE - August 16, 2023
* A Short Update - April 27, 2023
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